Saturday, October 01, 2005

GOING MOBILE!

Well my creativity seems to be at it's lowest ebb.I have started to look at the owl as a thing of beauty.just kidding.But seriously speaking I wasnt in any mood to blog.It was not running out of topics, just that I felt I was working too much.He He.The most important contribution of Modern Science to the mankind has been the discovery of the MOBILE phone.Well I must put it as the 2nd most important one.For me the first one will always remain the condom.But none of us can ignore the fact that the Mobile culture is growing on us even on Mohinder Amarnath who became famous for sayin I have only a lap not a laptop when asked about his technical expertise for holding the post of Indian coach.Well he sure does hold a Mobile I saw that for sure.

But the point is not only Amarnath but everyone seems to be having one.Even I have one for the record.It has just made it's presence omnipotent,especially in the Student community.
U'll c a guy or a gal from college coming to write an exam without a pen but not without an mobile.Now everyone knows y they do that.Saw MunnaBhai rite.A mobile is mightier than the word.U have all sorts of these moblies lightweight,heavy,feather weight even my weight.My dad used to hold one, that oldest phone which even Adam wud've desisted from using.He held that as if it were an MBE but due to increasing resistance within the family he disposed it and he took another one.Me n my dad r not tech savvy people but even in the hands of such people ur getting used to c a mobile.N my mobile even has a torch.Wat do i do with that?Find treasures in my mouth I guess which is aleady brimming with cement n holes.I have a bsnl phone at home.It acts even as a mobile.Simple,the moment u lift the reciever the cord which attaches the reciever n the phone comes out n ur left speakin 2 urself.

U can listen 2 a song,record ur own voice,watch movies,surf on the net,play 3D games god wat n wat not.But all this doesnt seem to satisfy the Delhi guy n yo he uses the other option MMS n well look wat's happened.That's the flip side.But the most irritating thing about the mobile is the SMS 'cos even I fell a prey for it.Not anymore 'cos am bak to Hyderabad where instead of sendin sms I cud've a decent lunch.Chennai is the place to be in if u want to have the real benefit of a cell phone.U have every scheme there pay n dont use,pay n useless,paymore useless,dont pay dont use name the crap u'll get it.All the couples at my college used to get themselves an add on card.N as usual the guy had to make the purchase n the add on was his sweety.N u cud speak on it for hours no billing.This became popular among staff also guy gettin the female teacher an add on card.Hey he was learning his tuitions.And the sms schemes dont ask it's free.A recent survey conducted by a reputed institution has indicated that due to free SMS married couples have stopped talkin 2 each other.
here's an eg:
HUSBAND:can v lay down the foundation for having children tonight?
WIFE:Y nite now itself jus come down to the kitchen naa,it's only a 300 Sq. foot walk from ur study.
Well well if they r so lazy I donno how Chennai still contributes in a handsome way to the Indian cause.V'll dig into that some other day.

But the worst thing is neither can u throw it away nor live peacefully with it.It's like ur drafter.
Drafter remember engg.drawing 1 year hmmm. Real pain in the d ass wasnt it.Fortunately I never had a Mobile when I was at college. Simple hostels r known for the grand ways in which ur things cud be stolen.U had a gang even better than Daniel Ocean's.Due to such gangs, my friends I have seen always ended up cursing everyone n Mobiles were first on their hit list.Do not think am too intelligent I lost Money if not a mobile.My friend had a brand bew 6600 which is broader than me n whoa he lost a whopping 14k on that.Add to that the new one he has got now 16k.Thankfully due to the curse of the devil he has completed his engg.N u can judge a person just by the way he is glued to his mobile.An even more efficient speed is to loook at the way his messages fly.
CASE 1:slow enuf for u to have a tea,eyes searching for the keys,poor guy doesnt know about the dictionary,gives up n asks u 2 type the message.Such guys generally loose their GF'S.
CASE2:is getting used to the dictionary is embedding all the bad words he knows into it.Has time only 2 scratch his ass wen he's hooked up.
CASE3:Well these r the SMS nerds.U have one look at them it wud be like watching a tennis match from the side rows.Eyes wud be moving faster n more faster n the fingers matching them frame 2 frame.Most likely to abuse u if disturbed.
CASE4:Well these r the people who give u a complex.Tell u that ur fit for nothing n that title wud be added to u disgracefully even
in the field of SMS.These r the kind who say "Hi machan" wave to u with their left hand offer u a smile.Well wat's wrong about them then?The thing is they wud be typing an SMS actually n act like speakin to u.Jerks is the only word I can find for those kinda people.I have seen many of my friends having twisted their necks havin a sour ass n broken nails,butter fingers,aching limbs.Achin limbs well my hostel dint have western toilets.Well all this is due
to the different poses they find themselves in while typing a message.People have started to use it even in the bathrooms just
to prove that even they work.Not only here but even Rahul,Saurav,sehwag,Sachin all of these n many more have been used to woo people n they have been a part of the network fights.Well Saurav again seems to be an exception.Due to his exemplary performance in the recent past he has been asked to step down n take care only of pre-paid duties.Post paid I heard mite land up with Greg.

And now it isnt hep to have earphones plugged to ur ears while driving no more OH HUMDUM SUNIYO RE.U can c a guy his ass wud be on the seat n his head wud be tilted so far towards the left u cud cut his hair n go.Yes ofcourse he wud speakin on his mobile.N the thing which makes me sick r these ringtones.Each time I hear to a sound buzzing I think it's my phone n VOILA my hand goes below I mean it's in my pant pocket.I have become so sensitive to these sounds that even a cockroach farting seems to be a ringtone n off my hands go down.If the same trend continues ppl will start doubtin if I have piles.And as if all this was not enuf udesparately pick ur mobile n make a call .One of the rare occurances.The best thing about my Dad havin a mobile is I can give him a missed call.Ya coming back to the point u pik ur phone dial ur friends no n wat do u hear "MANGAL MANGAL".This is the last nail in the coffin according to me u call to talk ur friend n all u hear is someone barking.Sorry that song is pretty good but imagine if someone has "AASHIQ BANAYAA AASHIQ BANAYAA" .Wat does ur friend do?He doent pik up the phone for a couple a minutes n ur left to rut in hell.N then he asks "GAANA MAST THA NA".Shit I am gettin a ring on my mobile ya am sure it's my mobile got 2 answer it or else at the ohter end "DIL CHAHTA HAI"
cyaa n happy weekend.
ashwin

6 comments:

Sameera said...

ROTFL ASHWIN
i guess u cant resist the use of "ass" and "fart" even tho its only a cockroach's.reallllly good post.
i guess saurav wil always be ur fav,man..

"Not anymore 'cos am bak to Hyderabad where instead of sendin sms I cud've a decent lunch"
lol..exaggeration helps eh.

keep it coming man..nice fun

Lord of all Things said...

heh gud one very gud !!! we all feel the same case of cant do.

Anonymous said...

U have a mobile now!!!that shows the world is actually going mobile!!(lol).With that highly developed sense o hearing(after all u can hear cockroaches farting!!)I bet u do hear a million things in the world which I unfortunately am deprived off..n i hope they find their space in ur next blog..cause im waiting!!!
KUZZY!!

Anonymous said...

n hey im no italian n neither do i understand it...so some explanation required!!Cogito ergo cum??????

cartic said...

yup..need an explanation for that title ?..cum??... and the blog was really a good one mammu !! yaa u dont seem 2 leave farting...but the truth is ..its a very nice post for the weekend ...

Anonymous said...

ashwin i know tht ur not gonna leave tht fart as your suffering from GASTRYTIS so consult a good doctor atleast then ull recover out of tht fart slowly and it will reduce if u take up the medication regularly

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